Speaking to a lot of women who are in the hobby, I hear this all the time. In general at arcades, they’re frequently condescended to (by strangers, who popped in unwelcome). I’ve heard a lot of gross sexual language seated either in “I’m just joking” at women OR the aforementioned “rape” a spinner.
And of course, I’ve heard a lot of women complain about Woah Nellie, which plenty of men in their own “safe spaces” away from women will grumble that some women are being too politically correct, it’s a silly joke, these feminists have no sense of humor-- whatever.
I too run a league, and I’ve tried to make it as inclusive as possible, to the point where I’ve written a full antiharassment policy, but of course I’m sure that plenty never makes its way back to me. My concern is that it is such an overwhelmingly male hobby-- from the top down— where Stern could make Woah Nellie and genuinely be shocked when there’s people who are upset by it that then its becomes an implicit invitation that this is largely for men, so such behavior is okay from the various behaviors listed across this thread, to say posting a bunch of scantly clad bikini babes when people start an online argument (not here at Tilt, mind).
I don’t know what the solutions are, as I doubt that the change will come from the top down, but I think women’s leagues and being aware that there’s many women that feel this way without immediately dismissing them is a good first step.